Okay, well, just to show everyone that yes, I AM still writing and haven't abandoned anything, I thought I'd provide a couple sneak previews to what I'm working on. Nothing on the next chap of DBtT yet, but I do have the Possession/Falling smuttiness almost finished. Then I also have a HoMin that few, if any, people knew I've been writing, which is also close to finished. So, enjoy these little peeks, and I'll hopefully have the full pieces up very soon for you guys. ^_^

( JaeMin-ness. XDD )

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( Broken HoMin? O_o )

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And that's it! Hope your guys' interest is... piqued. XDD And I will have the full pieces out for you ASAP. ^^

1. Where is Your Heart - Kelly Clarkson
2. 너를 사랑해 - F.T. Island
3. Dancin' in the Moonlight - Toploader
4. When I Saw You - Mariah Carey
5. I've Got You Under My Skin - Michael Buble
6. Believe - Josh Groban
7. Lessons Learned - Carrie Underwood
8. Your Love - Ennio Morricone, Dulce Pontes
9. In Peace - Epik High
10. Bolero for Violin & Orchestra - Vanessa Mae
11. Bu Shuo Hou Hui [不说后悔] - Wang Leehom
12. I Thought She Knew - 'N Sync
13. Tango: Maureen - Rent soundtrack
14. Holding On - Wild Orchid
15. Stay On - Sugar Ray
16. The Engagement Party - Jekyll & Hyde soundtrack
17. Dear Diary - Pink
18. To Love You More - Lucia Micarelli
19. Ame ni Utaeba ~Pichipichichapuchapuranranburusu~ - Miyavi
20. 50 Candles - Boyz II Men
21. Dead Zone - The Beautiful Game soundtrack
22. Two in a Million - S Club 7
23. Ready for the Good Times - Shakira
24. All in Love is Fair (Se L'Amore C'e) - Vittorio
25. I Hope I Don't Fall in Love With You - Marc Cohn
26. Prince - Vanessa Carlton
27. With You - Linkin Park
28. Whenever I Run - Keith Urban
29. Stand Up! - DBSK
30. Flowers and Juveniles - Twelve Girls Band
31. For the Life of Me - Daniel Kirkley
32. Someday - B*Witched
33. No More Sad Songs - Clay Aiken
34. Get Mine, Get Yours - Christina Aguilera
35. I Never - Jessica Simpson
36. Back to a Reason (Part II) - Trans-Siberian Orchestra
37. Dell'Amore Non Si Sa - Hayley Westenra & Andrea Bocelli
38. Wash Away Those Years - Creed
39. Trouble Is - Backstreet Boys
40. Ten Thousand Angels Cried - Leann Rimes

( And now, the questions... )

Or, as Changmin would say, a "reveration". XDDD

So, found this comment on an eng subbed version of the Miyaneya interview everyone's kinda freaking out about right now: "I think this may look worse than it really is. The interviewers are talking back and forth like Tohoshinki isn't even there. It is quite a weird interview. It does look like Yunho and Changmin are sharing one earpiece and Junsu and Yuchun another. JJ definitely doesn't have any wire, so he doesn't know what is happening. The whole situation is so awkward. Maybe they are facing something in this performance that is challenging, in addition to their other problems."

Went back and watched it again right after reading that, and it's true. Jae has NO wire, and thus really doesn't have any real idea of what's going on. And it does look the the other four are sharing two sets between them, which would explain Min's closeness to Yunho and "distance" from Jae. (And only in DBSK-land would 2-3 inches of space between them be considered a "huge gap", as I've seen some people describe it... O_o)

I'm not saying the interview wasn't terribly awkward, because it really REALLY was. But. I think, if you take this into consideration, it's really not as bad as we all (yes, including me. I kinda freaked a little. Not ashamed to admit it.) originally thought. And I'm also not saying everything's just peachy-keen (Yes, I said it, dammit! I'm a dork. Lemme alone. XP) between them. Because it might not be. We have no way of knowing, like, AT ALL. The tendency now, though, seems to be to read much more into every little nuance than may actually be intended/present at all.

Just my thoughts. *shrugs* Y'know, it's kinda sad that I never got this worked about anything in the BSB fandom, and that's when I was in prime fangirl age... *sighs* These boys... They'll be the death of me, I swear. Honors student in high school, have my Associate's and now Bachelor's degrees, but it'll be worrying about THEM that stresses me into an early grave... -_-

So, I found this article on allkpop, and... it's kinda pissing me off. Which is silly. It shouldn't. But it is.

Because, here's the thing: Kohaku is, as the article itself points out, a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge honor to be invited to. Major. As says the quote they excerpted from the Wikipedia page: "only the most successful J-POP artists and enka singers can perform." And instead of congratulating DBSK on being invited not just once but TWO YEARS IN A ROW, the article instead essentially whines that Big Bang WASN'T invited.

Now, no one start hating me, okay? I'm not pointing this out to diss Big Bang or anything. I don't know enough about Big Bang to do that. But. After, what, less than a year of activities in Japan, and they expected this group to be invited to what is essentially THE end-of-year music show in Japan for only the biggest artists? Are they DELUDING themselves?! DBSK worked for FOUR FREAKIN' YEARS before they got invited. They put in the time and effort to claw their way up from the bottom and have worked so hard to be respected as artists instead of just Hallyu stars or just another pretty idol group.

I'll admit, I don't know anything really about Big Bang's Japanese activities, except for the fact that they do have them. But can they really say the same thing? In my mind, no, not really. Because, if they could, no one would be expecting them to get an invitation to Kohaku in just their first year. Or even their second, as some of the commenters were saying. ARE they respected as Japanese artists, or are they successful in Japan due to their success in Korea? I don't know, honestly. If anyone has any answers, I wouldn't mind hearing them.

But, yeah. Annoyance. I'm a little bit protective of my boys; what can I say? XD

Okay, enough of my ranting. Sorry. Had to be done. (>_<) But I am now off to see how much money I'm gonna have to spend to get Morgan's Christmas present over to her. ^_____^

Calling all fellow DBSK/TVXQ/THSK fans!

We all know that the last few months in the fandom have been tense and stressful and downright scary. Well if we, as fans, are feeling all of that, just imagine how these boys are feeling. It's hard to even imagine the kind of pain they must be in right now.

And, so, it must be our mission to cheer them up, even just a little bit, right? ^_^

Check out the details here!

Soo...

First we had this. Then we had this. And now we have this.

I seriously... don't even know anymore. It's like, I TRY to keep up with the news, take everything with a grain of salt, and attempt to weed the more reliable info from the less reliable. But it's all still so damn confusing!

( Some optimism. Some pessimism. Mostly just realism. )

Title: Dreaming Back to This
Rating: currently PG-13ish, will eventually hit the R range
Genre: AU, sci-fi, suspense
Chapter: Divided Together (23/?)
Pairings: YooMin, HoSuJae
Summary: Changmin's running from a past he can't forget. Yoochun's running towards a future he can't see. Two people, seemingly on separate paths, collide. What starts in dreams…
Notes: I'd like to apologize to Changmin, because even though he'll never hear about this fic and will never actually be hurt from it, I still feel like an evil, horrible person. T_T
Previous: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20, Chapter 21, Chapter 23

( So Jaejoong simply keeps his hand running through Changmin's hair, hoping it keeps Changmin from falling off the edge into panic. )

Just saw the movie Paranormal Activity, and I am THOROUGHLY creeped out now. The beginning was actually pretty slow, kinda dragged a little bit, and large chunks of it were shot in that hand-held camera style, very Blair Witch-like, which was making me pretty nauseous. So I started thinking that it was just gonna be a big waste of my time and money. But then it actually started getting into the real paranormal stuff with less of the shaky camera work, and it started getting reallllllllly good. When the girl got dragged down the hall by NOTHING, and then there was a giant red BITE MARK on her back... Uh-uh. And then the ending. Oooohmygosh, that ending. Thoroughly creeped. I can imagine myself jumping at every little footstep or creak of the house over my head (since my bedroom's in the basement) for the next... while, at least. That movie definitely got to me. *shudders*

So, yeah, now I'm not gonna go to bed for a while. If I go to bed at all. May just sleep on my couch in front of the TV with all the lights on. *laughs*

Anywayz, in other news:

Yes, the Possession/Falling smut is being worked on. It's at... about 1700 words right now, but it's going slowly. For whatever reason, I seem to find smut muuuuuuch more difficult to write than pain and angst and death and what-not. *shrugs* So, just be patient with me. I'll get it finished eventually. ^^

And to all my DBtT readers, don't worry! I haven't forgotten that I still have that one hanging. The thing is, I have the whole general story arc alllll figured out, but I DON'T have it mapped out chapter-by-chapter. So I've pretty much been winging it when it comes down to specifics. Right now, I'm just in the process of figuring out exactly what I want the next chapter to be/do. I apologize that it's taking so long, but I don't want to just throw something out there then realize it takes me away from where the story's supposed to go. So, again, patience. XDD

We had mine and my dad's birthday party with the family. (My dad's b-day is today. Well, yesterday, technically. The 16th, whatever. Mine's on Sunday, the 18th. ^^) We had a pretty good crowd: Me and my parents, of course, plus my older niece Justus, my oldest brother and his little girl, my younger brother and his wife, my maternal grandmother, and my paternal grandparents with my aunt Donna. (She has Down's Syndrome and so still lives with my grandparents.) It was nice, had dinner then played some cards then a game of Balderdash. ^^ Then, when I got back from the movie, my grandparents had left my b-day card along with my money. XDDD So, now I have money to buy the Secret Code concert, though I think I'm gonna wait 'til the Korean/Hong Kong version is released. No sense paying all that extra money...

Hmm... Okay, that's all I can think of to ramble about now. Gonna go distract myself in other ways now. *laughs*

Edit: TSC Hong Kong version was released on the 15th. It has now been ordered and will be delivered in "6-14 business days". ^______^ Now I'm deciding if I should invest the rest of my b-day money towards saving for the Please Be Mine photobook, or if I should go ahead and buy the concert dvd's I'm currently missing (FiTB and T - well, I have a COPY of FiTB, but I'd like to replace it with the actual bought dvd...). Will just have to think on that for a little while... ^__^

You can learn a lot about someone by the music they listen to. So here is the game! Hit shuffle on your ipod or mp3 player and write down the first 25 songs. No cheating or skipping songs that are shameful. That is the fun! Then tag your friends.

tagged by narcolept_smurf

My iTunes is... pretty eclectic, so we'll just see how this goes... XDD

1. Without Love - Hairspray movie soundtrack
2. Unchained Melody - Leann Rimes
3. Take a Chance on Me - Mamma Mia original cast soundtrack
4. One More Angel in Heaven - Joseph and the Amazing Techincolor Dreamcoat soundtrack
5. The Dementors Converge - Harry Potter PoA soundtrack
6. One of Us - A*Teens
7. Follow Me - Wild Orchid
8. Closing Ment - DBSK Mirotic tour album
9. Runaway Run - Hanson
10. You're My Miracle (Japanese vers.) - DBSK
11. Satellites - Sugar Ray
12. Incomplete Melody - Wang Leehom
13. Shakespeare ni Sasagu - Miyavi
14. San Francisco - Vanessa Carlton
15. Don't - Rachael Yamagata
16. Lovely Day - Super Junior
17. You Got It - *N Sync
18. Dentro un Alto Si - Il Divo
19. 사랑을 할 땐 - Son HoYoung
20. Missing My Baby - Selena
21. I Love You - SG Wannabe
22. That's the Way - Jennifer Lopez
23. Something Kinda Funny - Spice Girls
24. Love Me Tender - Wang Leehom
25. Men in Black - Will Smith

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Hmm... So, whaddaya think? Strange enough for you? XDDD Kinda surprised there's no Backstreet Boys or Vanessa Mae, since I have so much of their music, after DBSK and Leehom. But, ah well. Still a pretty good variety there. ^^

Tagging... whoever's bored enough to do this. XDDD

My LiveJournal Trick-or-Treat Haul
dreaming_col goes trick-or-treating, dressed up as vampire.
briochick gives you 14 red-orange strawberry-flavoured pieces of taffy.
chloe1910 gives you 13 mottled green strawberry-flavoured gumdrops.
cybermuffin18 tricks you! You lose 17 pieces of candy!
emda gives you 19 teal mint-flavoured gummy worms.
feyla tricks you! You lose 5 pieces of candy!
kirch_it_up tricks you! You lose 15 pieces of candy!
kittysalias gives you 8 dark blue tropical-flavoured gummy worms.
kratynoi gives you 7 softly glowing apple-flavoured pieces of chewing gum.
littleanomaly gives you 14 milky white spearmint-flavoured pieces of taffy.
narcolept_smurf gives you 7 dark blue chocolate-flavoured wafers.
dreaming_col ends up with 45 pieces of candy.
Go trick-or-treating! Username:
Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern.

So, overall, Rose and Morgan and Angel are big ol' meanie-heads. *laughs* But, despite them, I guess I still did pretty well. XDDD

Edit: Poll is now closed! Thank you to everyone who voted and gave their input. Official results? *looks down* Hm, seems like I'm gonna have to do both of them... -_- Seriously, guys, if these just royally suck, you aren't allowed to blame me, 'kay? XDD And, since #1 got the most other votes, I'm gonna start with that one. Makes sense, yes? ^_^ Anyway, it is actually already started. Got... probably a couple hundred words down the other day. So I am definitely hoping to have that one posted within a week or so. ^^

So, I've realized lately that I reallllllly miss this 'verse. Like, reallyreally. And because of that, I have come to a decision.

I had a loooot of people ask me for a special smut bonus at the end there, and I kinda... cheated my way out of it. Just a little. XD But I have now resolved to try again. I'm not promising good smut, mind you. It will, after all, be only my second attempt at... the full act. But I do promise to try. This is where I need your help, though. You see, I've got two different ideas and can't decide which one to go with. So I'll present you guys with these two ideas and take a vote to decide which one I'm gonna work on. And now that you know the situation, here are your options:

#1: Basically a sequel to this bonus. The group has two consecutive days completely free. Jae and Min take the opportunity to kick the others out of the apartment for some "quality" time. This scenario will be Min's first time, Min as bottom. Probably much slower-paced, romantic and sweet.

#2: A quick, stolen moment. The boys have a little bit of wait after rehearsal, before a scheduled interview. Jae and Min sneak away to steal some private time. Will be much quicker, less sappy/romantic. Jae as bottom in this one.

Poll #1466104 Possession/Falling Bonus Options
This poll is closed.
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 10

So, which one would you rather read?

So I just watched the JaeChun 'Colors' offshot movie. And, towards the end, when they're painting the wall, I had to laugh. Because, um, hi. Chunnie painting a pair of lips with the words "Kiss me" above it? *points at icon* Did I not call that?! XDDD

I'm a horrible person. I know I've said it before in this journal, and it's just as true now as it was then. If not even moreso.

I've been lying to everybody - and I mean EVERYBODY - for the last month and a half. And now I've screwed myself over. People are probably going to hate me when the truth comes out. It will come out, too, because I can't DO this anymore. It won't come out here, though. Those people who are directly involved will be talked to one-on-one, because it's only fair to them.

But... I'm sitting here, just crying. And I had to write this out, because it needs to be let out somewhere right now, or I'm afraid I'll do something... drastic. Hell, maybe I still will. I don't know right now. Guess it depends on people's reactions after they hear the truth and how I feel after finally telling them.

I'm just... I'm pretty much a miserable failure. I admit it. Most of you probably will never know why I'm saying this, but I promise you it's true. And to those who are directly involved, I'm sorry. I'm so, so, so, so, SO sorry. I really have no one else to blame but myself. And I do absolutely blame myself. Everyone just gave me so many chances, and I... blew them all. Because, I guess, that's just the kind of person I am.

And I'm so terrified right now. Because I love my friends. I really do, with my whole heart. I hope they know that, whether I say it to them or not. And I hope they remember that after I tell them the truth. My friends... They're the types to hold high expectations, for themselves and for those around them. And I just... I fall short. Very, VERY short. And I lied to them for the simple fact that I KNOW I fall short, and I was absolutely terrified to lose them if they found out. Now they will find out, because I CAN'T hide it anymore. And I just can't imagine what I'll do if I lose any of them. My friends are my support and comfort that my family either can't or, more often, WON'T be. I can't imagine my life without them, and it scares me so much that I may have to face that.

So, I'm sorry. And I do really, really love you guys. I just hope you can say the same about me when this is all over.

Title: Dreaming Back to This
Rating: currently PG-13ish, will eventually hit the R range
Genre: AU, sci-fi, suspense
Chapter: Strength in Despair (22/?)
Pairings: YooMin, HoSuJae
Summary: Changmin's running from a past he can't forget. Yoochun's running towards a future he can't see. Two people, seemingly on separate paths, collide. What starts in dreams…
Notes: I'm sorry. That is all. T_T
Previous: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20, Chapter 21

( Yoochun watches, horrified, as Changmin sways then hits the floor. )

So, I'm pretty much exhausted. Work has been kicking my butt lately, and it's kinda starting to get to me. ( Follow the cut only if you really want to hear some ranting. )

Okay. Now that that's out of the way. XDD

I'm working on a pretty cool (at least in my opinion) project right now for all you DBSK fic readers. I don't wanna say too much right now, but it should be out (i.e. made public) in the next week or so. Hopefully everyone enjoys it as much as I'm thinking I'd enjoy something like this. ^_^ So, yeah, keep an eye out for that.

And if you actually went through and read all my ranting, thank you. Or I'm sorry, one or the other. XD

First random thought? I start a lot of subject lines with the word "random". Or at least include the word somewhere in the line. I'm no good with original subjects. Whatever. XD

So, one of the perks of working at a bookstore is that we get advance reading copies of upcoming novels that we're allowed to take home and read. It's really cool. I'm reading this one right now called The Maze Runner by James Dashner. (Being released on October 6, so check it out. ^^) It's kind of a mystery/suspense/sci-fi young adult novel, and I'm reallllly enjoying it.

But that's not the point. The point is... The main character, Thomas, meets this other boy, and... well. I'm just gonna excerpt this part: "Thomas was just passing the Box when he was surprised to see someone enter the Glade from the MAze, through the West Door, to his left -- an Asian kid with strong arms and short black hair, who looked a little older than Thomas." So, yeah, I was kinda excited to have an Asian character in novel that's not blatantly Asian, so that was pretty cool. But then. Then. "Alby jogged up then, clearly upset. 'What're you doin' back, Minho?'" HIS NAME'S FREAKIN MINHO!!!! -_- Korea is stalking me, I swear. And it's not even the fact that it's a Korean name. It's freakin' Minho. Shinee kid, Minho. DBSK pairing, Minho. What the hell... XDDD

In other news: my birthday's in a month in and 5 days. I always get $50 from my paternal grandparents for my birthday. I'm soooo planning on buy The Secret Code Tour dvd with that money. This plan, of course, hinges on the dvd's not selling out. But I'm optimistic. Just because.

And... yeah. I think that's all the news I have for now. Life's still boring; I'm still waiting. *shrugs*

Title: Dreaming Back to This
Rating: currently PG-13ish, will eventually hit the R range
Genre: AU, sci-fi, suspense
Chapter: Moving Forward, Going Back (21/?)
Pairings: YooMin, HoSuJae
Summary: Changmin's running from a past he can't forget. Yoochun's running towards a future he can't see. Two people, seemingly on separate paths, collide. What starts in dreams…
Notes: And it starts. Hope you guys are ready for the ride to really get started now...
Previous: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20

( I debated so many plans to remove myself from their lives and let them get back to normal, but I never did. And I should have. )